Have you ever started a job and wondered, "What does my boss care about?" We all know that every boss has certain expectations and idiosyncrasies, but most of us spend months (and sometimes years) trying to figure out what they are. None of us like that, so why don't we turn that around? Why don't we make clear to our employees, from day one, what our expectations and idiosyncrasies are?
This week, we started two new employees at Seneca Creek—and one of the pieces of paper they get is entitled, "Bruce's Idiosyncrasies". So, from day one, they know all of my little pet peeves as well as my big "rock" items. The big "rock" issues are easy for most of us to identify, like "I care passionately about us getting our work done, on time, with excellence." But, it's often the little things that really get under our skin that hinder our relationships with staff that we don't communicate.
For example, "I really dislike it when people leave a conference room with the chairs all over the room (i.e. not pushed in to the table neatly arranged)" I know this is obsessive compulsive, but it is me (and, in our case, I am the boss). Keeping an office environment clean matters to me. It's one of those excellence things (and, in our case, core value number three). When someone leaves a conference room a mess (or a production room), it communicates, "I don't care" or "Someone else needs to clean up my mess" or "I'm too important to clean up my
stuff" or "Excellence doesn't matter to me." In other words, it doesn't communicate anything positive. And frequently, I end up going in and straightening the chairs and cleaning up someone else's mess. As you can tell, this bugs me. But, if I never communicate this, and someone doesn't clean up, and I keep this frustration buried inside me, chances are, it'll poison our relationship.
So, what are your idiosyncrasies? What are the big "rock" issues and the little "issues" that get under your skin? In my case, it's a list of a little over twenty things that new employees know from day one. They don't need to play the guessing game or wait six months until the hammer comes down. No, from day one, they know what will make me happy and what will tick me off—which, as an employee, is a good thing to know!
Good idea. We just hired a new guy two weeks ago and I have found myself telling him almost every day little things that drive me nuts. He probably thinks I am nuts. :)
Posted by: Gary | Wednesday, March 30, 2005 at 08:44 PM
Good point, but it's also very important to let the staff know WHY this stuff is so important - why and how it links into the BIG PICTURE. I run through this with my kids all the time, and it's a fundamental point I drive home when consulting with and coaching managers.
Posted by: Malcolm Munro | Saturday, April 02, 2005 at 08:25 AM
Another way to look at this is to ask your staff two questions. First, "What do you care about?" I know I'm the boss, but this question both honors them and helps me understand them. Second, "What do I do that really drives you crazy?" Sometimes the answer is hard to hear but it helps me become a better leader.
Posted by: Rich Viel | Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 12:12 PM
I am a new youth pastor for a church. It is my first month out of Bible college, and I have had alot of questions about expectations and getting the job done. I've had over 8 years hands on ministry experience so I know a fair amount, but my new pastor approaches ministry very different from the way I am used to. For instance, I just found out that the youth ministry doesn't have access to any of the office supplies, and there is little money in the budget. That's a good thing to know going in. We have to raise all of our money and purchase our own supplies. That's fine, I have no problem with that, I'm just need to know this sort of thing. I'm looking forward to my meeting with him to discuss all of the details: what he expects, what helps me to work successfully, etc. Any suggestions from you folk on how to make this as smooth of a process as possible?
Posted by: Andy | Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 12:46 PM
I am beginning a new job as preschool director of a weekday ministry in a local church. The ministry has been having a difficult year and the church wants to start new and rebuild for the next school year. I am coming in to an established program and am not a member this local church. Any ideas on how I can best express my expectations in a positive manner??
Posted by: Sue Ann | Tuesday, April 05, 2005 at 01:22 PM
I appreciate the comments of Malcolm & Rich. Everything, from the first "welcome" to the last "God Bless you in your new ministry" should be covered in what we call "O.L.C." Open, Loving Communication.
This communication is also a two way street. I like Rich's approach of reversing the question. What does the new person hold important (his/her "rocks") and what drives them nuts! (and yes Bro. Gary, you might be right, haha!) It also takes time and patience to learn one another's strenghts and weaknesses and become a team. Assuming you are building a "team."
I'm guessing that there was some humor intended in the "I'm the boss" statment from the article BUT, a real lay down the law, "I'm the boss" approach can quickly become a spirit crusher. I completely understand and agree with coming under and being accountable to the Sr./Lead Pastors authority but oh how it saddens me to see a church bring in a new person with a new vision and a fresh spirit for a particular ministry but the church (or the pastor) first begins by making sure they conform to norm. I understand the chair/conference room thing and excellence and in certain areas and on certain points I can be the same BUT, there can quickly come a point where it's like the rearranging of chairs on the deck of the First Church of the Titanic...if ya know what I mean.
In Christ,
Ben E.
PS. To Andy or any one who has this situation: We don't have the particulars on the overall ministry Andy is beginning BUT...If you come into or presently have a Student Ministry that's being treated as a second class citizen, even in the office supply department, that is messed up! My humble opinion.
Posted by: Ben E. | Wednesday, April 06, 2005 at 08:47 AM
After three years of transition at our church, January began the five-year term of our new pastor. I think he's doing a wonderful job. Problem is...I am the secretary (in ministry training) who walked with the congregation through those three years. They are very comfortable coming to me with problems, questions, concerns, etc. I know that this is just a transition time and I am trying to gently shuffle people in the direction of the pastor so they will go to him first. He, on the other hand, is getting frustrated because they don't go to him first and is beginning to lay down the law with me about dealing with people. How can I make him understand that it's been three years...he's been here three months...I don't want to steal the confidence of the congregation from him...I want them to go to him first? I don't want to lose the trust of the congregation in the process...I've worked very hard on my relationship with them and I'm afraid that, if I just shut them down like he suggests, they won't come to either of us with their concerns. Help!
Posted by: D. Woods | Wednesday, April 06, 2005 at 09:42 AM
Bruce, putting chairs back in place is not a "little" thing. You have a compulsive disorder, and you should deal with it, rather than expect your team to have to deal with it simply because you refuse to... because "you are the boss." If you refuse to seek help, I don't expect any more explanations or blog writing can help you...
There's a big difference between being at meetings on time, and tucking chairs under a table. One affects productivity, the other is a compulsive disorder.
Someone has to tell you that you have a disorder... I'm sure your workers won't, because it would "upset the boss" and his rules.
...Bernie
http://www.oneplace.com/ministries/247
Posted by: bernie dehler | Wednesday, April 06, 2005 at 12:27 PM
Ben, thank you for you comments. Unfortunately, in many churches we do find that youth ministry is considered second rate. In my church the youth are valued, but financially the church just doesn't have the budget to delegate much funds to the youth department. I have a pioneering spirit so taking on this sort of challenge is a thrill. I'm getting to build from the ground up, and in the process build enthusiasm and support among the church body for the youth ministry. I have encountered somewhat of the "norm" thing at my church. They highly value relationships and are trying to get away from the cathedral model of worship and teaching to being more about modeling and an incarnational approach. That philosophy greatly affects the models that I can put in place to reach the teens. Normally, this would seem like a crazy situation to put myself in right out of schooling, but I know in my knower that God called me here, so I'm going to do everything I can to be cooperative with this pastor and learn to complement each others quirks. :) Would you agree that this is good?
Posted by: Andy | Wednesday, April 06, 2005 at 04:04 PM